Listening to: Nothing
Alright, so far I've been doing pretty good in the past couple of months or so with not being upset or anything.. But this week just hit me full throttle.. I don't know if it's karma for something bad I did in the past, I just have bad luck, or someone or some being is trying to teach me a lesson or something. But my week has been awful. I have barely had ONE good day this week.
Starting Sunday, I caught a fever for the first time in like 9 years. I was sick from Sunday morning all the way until Monday afternoon. Missed school.
Monday night when I went home (I was at my boyfriends), I went to bed expecting to go to school the next day. Was woken up at 4 in the morning by my mom saying that I was going to stay home to make sure I was better. I was like "Ok, fine by me. I'll make everything up.". I thought my day was going to be ok. But no... You know what happened? My dog got sick. He got a kidney infection and I spent most of the day cleaning and taking care of him.
I swear this week is so bad because my dog is sick. I've cried so much today because I'm scared he's going to die and I can't do much to anything about it. He stopped peeing blood (since we gave him medication and shots and such), but he still isn't doing much. I slept with every night now but I hate leaving him here by himself during school because noone's fucking home. It can't be helped, because both my parents work.. But it scares me... Because what if I come home one day and he's dead?
I keep apologizing to him because I can't do much of anything to help him other than make him drink water, bundle him up, and keep him some company.. But it makes it worse because he can't understand what I'm saying. I've had him since he was a newborn because we had to bottle feed him. I don't know what I'd do if he died. I had him, his older brother (passed away..), and mother (passed away). Both the brother and mother died just nearly a year ago, at most, and just weeks apart. I can't lose him too...
I don't want him to die, but we've already done most of what we could. My valentines day sucks the most because it all just hit me hard that he may not make it, and I hate it.
EDIT: He died... No later than 30 minutes ago.. Rest in peace, Tator.. You were an amazing dog, and I will always love you. I'm sorry I waited so long to tell you it was OK for you to pass away, so you suffered more than you had to. Be at peace, and say hello to the others for me, ok? I'm going to miss you loads <3